Why Did They Leave? Reinventing and Revitalizing the Exit Interview
- Dr. CK Bray
- Oct 2
- 2 min read
Updated: Oct 3
When a valued employee resigns, many organizations scramble to conduct exit interviews but often miss the mark. People rarely reveal their true motivations without being prompted. The best managers understand that uncovering these genuine reasons requires finesse, curiosity, and an intentional approach.
Drawing on research with more than a thousand job switchers, here is a streamlined guide to interview questions that explore both the functional and emotional dynamics behind career moves:
Understanding Their Journey
Begin by creating a safe and open space. Ask questions like:
What problems with your daily work assignments, projects, and tasks sparked your desire to explore a change?
Which aspects of your workplace environment felt most draining or energizing?
Mapping Push and Pull
Resignation decisions often blend “push” (why they left) with “pull” (what they were drawn to). To uncover this:
What were you seeking in the new opportunity that you felt was missing here?
How did external factors like company mission, flexibility, leadership, or values influence your decision?
These questions illuminate what may have felt more attractive elsewhere and why those elements mattered in the moment.
They help tease out “push” factors such as mismatch, overload, or boredom. Next, dig into the emotional and social layers:
How well did the social climate, team relationships, manager support, and recognition match what you needed?
Did your work feel emotionally energizing, or did it leave you depleted?
This invites honest reflection on social disconnects, diminished energy, or culture friction.
Exploring Deeper Motivations
Most job changes arise from one or more of four core quests for progress:
Get out – leaving because something feels toxic, stagnant, or just not right.
Regain control – struggling with unpredictable schedules, micromanagement, or lack of autonomy.
Find alignment – craving work that resonates with personal strengths, values, or goals.
Take the next step – eager for new challenges or milestones after completing something.
Ask them:
Which of these best describes your main reason for leaving right now?
Were there moments when you felt your capabilities or values were out of sync with the work?
Did you feel clear about your future path, or did things feel stalled?
Reflecting on What Might Have Shifted the Outcome
Exit interviews often close the door, but the real value is in learning how it could have stayed open. Encourage them to reflect:
Is there anything the organization could have done that might have kept you?
Were there opportunities, support, or changes that would have altered your decision?
How did leadership, culture, or growth pathways influence your thinking?
This frames their choice not as final, but as part of an experience worth improving for others and the future you.
What Leaders Should Do With These Answers
Design stay interviews that explore these questions before someone gives notice, especially around progress, alignment, and growth.
Develop flexible roles that mirror employees’ evolving strengths and aspirations, what researchers call “shadow roles.”
Build systems that enable career fluidity, stretch projects, autonomy, and coaching—that keep those dopamine-driven motivation loops alive.
*Image by Freepik
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